Fake it til' you make it....

Continuing in Hebrews this morning, I look again at these heroes of faith listed in chapter 11.

Some of these people had great victories. Some had terrible defeat, disappointments, and some suffered or even died. Some of them never realized the purpose of it all in the grand scheme of things.

I often get on my soapbox about faith. I can carry on and on about how our faith must be in the Creator God of the universe, not in our ability to believe something. We can’t just grit our teeth, set our jaw, and determine to set our mind to it., and be any better off than we were. ( …in fact, I think it just hardens us when over and over we believe the enemy lie that it’s all up to us..)

Yes, we can and must make a choice and a decision. Yes, we must purpose in our hearts. But if we are the only source and the only determining factor in this faith, we are idolatrous. We have faith in ourselves.

I have thanked God so often for the words of the sick boy‘s father, "I do believe; help my unbelief." (Mark 9:24 NIV)

What an honest approach to God. I wonder why we think we can fake it til we make it with Him?

　

　

Faith isn’t something you can build up like a retirement fund. It isn’t something you can store away for future use like a pantry of food. You can’t save it up and watch it grow like money in a bank drawing interest. And no matter how much you have, it alone will never be enough.

Faith is meaningless without an object Who empowers and brings life. When Connie Pinkham is the object, simply my own self determination and choice, it is empty and worthless, leading only to death in situations, in relationship, and ultimately, in eternal death.

Faith in the Father of humanity makes the unseen real and it ushers in His grace, mercy, and strength. Faith in God demands that I have less and less faith in myself. As faith in Him increases, I realize over and over again my own inadequacy and His complete adequacy.

I purpose today to not fake it with Him.

And friend, I encourage you to get to know Him, don’t just decide to ‘be good’ or ‘act right’. Don’t think you can put your ears back and ‘have faith’. Don’t fake it. Because I can assure you, you won’t make it without His aid.

　

　

L O L.......smh...

LOL….smh……

For those of you who don’t recognize modern day shorthand, those letters mean a big ‘laugh out loud‘, and then ‘shaking my head'.　

　

Hebrews chapter 11 is often called the ‘hall of faith’. Listed there are people we refer to as heroes of faith. I stop at Sarah’s name, remembering how she laughed at a promise of God.

"So Sarah laughed to herself as she thought, "After I am worn out and lord is old, will I now have this pleasure?" Then the LORD said to Abraham, "Why did Sarah laugh and say, 'Will I really have a child, now that I am old?' Is anything too hard for the LORD?”(Genesis 18:12-14 NIV)　

Then her name is listed in this hall of faith chapter, branding her a heroine of faith, a believer in the promise of God.

“ And by faith even Sarah, who was past childbearing age, was enabled to bear children because she considered him faithful who had made the promise.” (Hebrews 11:11 NIV)　

I identify with Sarah. (….certainly not in the childbearing thing !!)

I understand how it feels to look at the circumstances of life and chuckle in disbelief.

I think about how long I have loved and claimed the promise of God as recorded by the prophet Jeremiah, “For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”(Jeremiah 29:11 NIV)

I pray that it won’t be a long wait until I can laugh again with her, reflecting back on this day, marveling at how God has done exactly what He said. His plan is good. Whatever it is, however long it takes, it will bring a smile and laughter.

　

“Sarah said, "God has brought me laughter, and everyone who hears about this will laugh with me." (Genesis 21:6 NIV)

I do laugh with you sister Sarah. And anticipate much more laughter in our future.

Standing on the promises of God ♫♪♪♫••*•♫♪♫•*•♫

　

People don’t always stand on their promises. Sadly, the trust factor between people is little to none these days. Even when something is documented, promises are broken.

I intend to keep my promises, but I too have often failed. I have learned not to make a lot of them.

Tonight, in some time alone in God’s Word, I’m thanking Him again for His faithfulness in keeping His promises. Whether any other human being is trustworthy or not, whether promises are made and kept, or made and ignored, God’s promises are sure. I can stand firmly on that.

　

“God is not unjust; he will not forget your work and the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them.” (Hebrews 6:10 NIV)

People forget, at least some of them do.

God never forgets.


　

An officer recently called our home to share a memory of when he was a rookie in training. A call came in about a woman who was causing a disturbance at a business. Eager to get there, and anticipating that they would escort the woman out of town, he was surprised to end up feeding the distraught and troubled woman, finding a way to get her shelter, contacting help for her, all of which calmed her and brought the situation under control.

What a gift it was to hear that the young officer tell the story of that day and how he had learned a valuable lesson.

Some people don’t forget.

God never forgets.

Hallelujah.

Ignorance is bliss.....

The recent events in our lives are hard to discuss. It’s complicated. But should I care to discuss it to a trusted friend, they try to understand. Their hearing me goes beyond comprehending my words. They may have never known or suspected anything amiss, they were ignorant. At least by Webster’s definition.

Webster defines ignorant as “destitute of knowledge; uninstructed or uninformed; untaught; unenlightened”

There is a huge difference in ignorance and ignoring. It’s one thing to not know something, but the offense is multiplied when we simply ignore it. Ignoring is intentional.

Do we act on what is revealed to us? Of choose to ignore?

Discerning good, recognizing evil, responding in a right way, taking appropriate action….or take no action, no active response to the revelation of truth.

　

　

The writer of Hebrews warns us about such. He stresses to us that maturity must be our goal. Learning and growing are not accidental. It is purposed. Intentional. Goal-specific.

“We have much to say about this, but it is hard to make it clear to you because you no longer try to understand.”(Hebrews 5:11 NIV)

I wonder, what has God told me to do that I have not been obedient in?

What has been revealed that I ignore?

What is it that is unclear to me simply because I refuse to engage my mind and heart to understanding?

Why should God go any further with me in the process of growing me up, if I refuse to act on the truth He has already revealed to me?

What is the last thing that you understood God instruct you to do? Have you done it? When is the last time you bent your ear to listen to Him? He still speaks, thru His Word, and has even provided a tutor, the Holy Spirit.

I purpose today to engage my entire self in understanding.

I purpose to act in obedience to whatever bit of understanding I gain, obediently participating with Him in establishing the line of communication between us.

I purpose to not ignore His still small Voice.

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

Drifting too far....

Drifting too far from the shore….

Kerry and I sing a song with that lyric, it’s one of my favorite.

Seems to be an epidemic of drifting these days. There are so many principles compromised, integrity absent, more gray areas than black and white.

Standing firmly on truth and what is right turns a person into a square peg, while there are mostly round holes.

Even in the first century there were issues. The believers who walked with Jesus, families who had such fresh experience with God in flesh, having heard for themselves, having heard from direct witnesses…and yet they drifted away, not anchored in truth.

It is imperative to have an anchor if you don’t want to drift. We must have it in possession, yet it is not enough to have it. We must carry it with us, always have it in the boat, know how to use it, and USE it. We must be familiar with it, but even familiarity can dangerous. Chunking it overboard doesn’t mean it’s anchored to anything solid, doesn’t mean waves can’t push us from the shore.

Mental assent is as useless as just having an anchor.

We say “I go to church.” “I attend bible study.” Or even “I have a degree from a bible school“ None of it makes one automatically anchored. We are warned in scripture with those first generations of Christians.
"So we must be more careful to follow what we were taught. We must be careful so that we will not be pulled away from the true way.”(Hebrews 2:1 ERV)

“….


we must pay closer attention to what we have heard. Then we won't drift away from the truth.” ( Hebrews 2:1 GW)

"Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts as you did in the rebellion." Who were they who heard and rebelled? Were they not all those Moses led out of Egypt?”(Hebrews 3:16 NIV)


“But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called "Today," so that none of you may be hardened by sin's deceitfulness.”(Hebrews 3:13 NIV)


　

I’ve been led out of my own slavery, made ‘free indeed’ (John 8:35 NIV) by the blood of Jesus.

Today, I hear His Voice in scripture and hear the whispering still small Voice of the Holy Spirit.

I purpose to use the anchor I am provided. Whether anyone else does or not.

And I pray for help that I am not hardened of heart or unaware of my own drifting.


　

dik-ah-yos-oo'-nay...it's Greek to me.....

dikaiosune..... a word from the original language of scripture translated as ‘righteousness’. It is defined as the state of him who is as he ought to be, integrity, virtue, purity of life, rightness, correctness of thinking feeling, and acting, justice or the virtue which gives each his due
　
　
Righteousness and happiness. Holiness and joyfulness. I wonder, is there a connection? Or are they are mutually exclusive?
 
We are instructed to have holiness as our goal. “But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: "Be holy, because I am holy." (1 Peter 1:15-16 NIV) If you purpose to be holy, does that mean you will be less happy?

I wonder that we don’t think being a disciple of Christ Jesus means that we give up pleasure, putting off our surrender to Him until after we have ‘sown wild oats’. The wisdom of the world concludes that being a follower of Jesus means a life of drudgery, enduring the painful days and years of behavior modification and self denial.
 
Nothing could be further from the truth. In fact, I think perhaps joy is diminishes with each compromise we make away from the goal of holiness.

Jesus was perfect. He was perfect in righteousness, and according to the writer of Hebrews quoting the Psalmist, was more joyful than all his companions. “… thou has loved righteousness and hated iniquity; therefore God, even thy God, hath anointed thee with the oil of gladness above thy fellows.”(Hebrews 1:9 KJV)
 
Multitudes of people were drawn to Him. Even though He was a ‘man of sorrows‘ (Isa. 53:3 KJV) He was incredibly attractive to all sorts of people.
 
Loving righteousness= loving what is right.

It is God Who decides what is right, and whether you agree, whether the civil law agrees, or even whether national law agrees, what God says is right, simply is.

Coming to acknowledge that and choose to submit our will is the only way we find joy, only then that true happiness comes into our lives.
 
Oh, we may believe the enemy’s lie and think our behavior and activities make us happy, but until the joy of the Lord is experienced, you just have no idea what joy eludes you…..

That hurts so good....

My man has leg cramps. His feet hurt. His neck aches. His back aches….

And he likes it rubbed hard enough to make it hurt. He sucks in his breath, moans in pain, yells sometimes…and says it feels good. I don’t have the strength anymore (unless I use an elbow) to rub his aching muscles hard enough to suit him.

Now me…I don’t want it to hurt ! If I have a painful muscle, that’s quite enough for me. I’ll just let it hurt til it quits, not help it along with more discomfort. But, that’s just me….maybe cause I’m a wimpy girl…

I do know what it is like to have something hurt and feel good at the same time. The pushing in labor pains comes to mind. And recent life circumstances….　

　"Your love has given me great joy and encouragement, because you, brother, have refreshed the hearts of the Lord's people. “(Philemon 1:7 NIV)

The word ‘joy’ has come alive with meaning to us. I now have cause to identify with Paul in a new way. In anticipating future prayers for those who have ministered to us, loved us, and put us at Jesus’ feet.  My heart cries ‘Amen’ even now.

I thank Him for the refreshment that came to us thru ‘the Lord’s people’, and encourage you who are ‘fellow-believers’ to add your thanksgiving to mine.

“Every time your name comes up in my prayers, I say, "Oh, thank you, God!….Friend, you have no idea how good your love makes me feel, doubly so when I see your hospitality to fellow believers.” (Philemon 1:4,7 The Message)
 
As we sang this past Lord’s Day… “blessed be Your name, when I'm found in the desert place, though I walk through the wilderness. blessed be Your name”  I bless His Name, and beg blessings on His people.

We are thankful for the joy in the suffering.

　

　

Are you a leader or mentor....?

Leader. Mentor. Is there a difference?

At what age is that rite of passage from ‘young’ to ‘old’? When is it that we can be off the hook? Surely there is a time when we could excuse ourselves because we haven’t been shown or taught…

"God overlooks it as long as you don't know any better--but that time is past. The unknown is now known…”(Acts 17:30 The Message)

Well, I guess that settles that….age has little to do with responsibility of knowing and obeying God’s Word.

　
"…teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.”(Titus 2:3-5 NIV)

I remember a time that it occurred to me that I wasn’t in the same category anymore. I’ve joked many a time about being old and tired, but in reality and as time passes, I move further away from the young category and closer to the old (and I praise Him for every day He gives).


Yet again I am challenged to look at the responsibilities ahead. We don’t ever get done. As long as there is breath, there is influence and responsibility. And whose? The young point to the old people. The old point to the young.


The young people often think the old should be perfected by now, criticizing the methods they cling to, while the older people think the young are perpetually ignorant and inadequate, refusing to allow them the space to make mistakes and learn from them. Both are often negligent in investing themselves in cultivating relationships. Mentoring …being mentored. Leading…being led.


The older person can be heard to say, ‘I’ve done my part’. The younger person conveniently uses the excuse ‘I don’t have any experience in that’. When we gain a bit of knowledge and experience in one thing, we should be able to just do that from now on, right?


Yet again these words of scripture convict me…“….teach the older women to live the way those who serve the Lord should live. They should not go around saying bad things about others or be in the habit of drinking too much. They should teach what is good. By doing this they will teach the younger women to love their husbands and children. They will teach them to be wise and pure, to take care of their homes, to be kind, and to be willing to serve their husbands. Then no one will be able to criticize the teaching God gave us.”(Titus 2:3-5 ERV)

Am I young, or old? Am I a leader, or a mentor?

Yes.

I purpose to examine myself to see that I honor God in every aspect of both.

 

I don't know which part of me is more tired.....

I’m pooped. My body is tired. My mind is tired. And as always, God’s Word speaks right on time and right on topic.

“….constant study wears you out so you're no good for anything else. The last and final word is this: Fear God. Do what he tells you. And that's it.

Eventually God will bring everything that we do out into the open and judge it according to its hidden intent, whether it's good or evil.” (Ecc. 12:12-14 The Message)
I purpose to stop going over details, stop all attempts to explain or understand. It just simply is..

I purpose to simply be His child, act like His child, and wait.

….and beg for His help to do so.

Praying ahead...

It is a short drive from our home to town. That 8-10 minutes drive has been prayer time for many years.

Protect.
Guide decisions.
Be fair to all.


See the spiritual as well as the physical.
Speak encouragement.
Mentor.
　

I have one list, he had another. You have yours, I hope….

Solomon’s advice for the workday ahead is this:
“Go to work in the morning and stick to it until evening without watching the clock. You never know from moment to moment how your work will turn out in the end.

Even if you live a long time, don't take a single day for granted. Take delight in each light-filled hour, Remembering that there will also be many dark days And that most of what comes your way is smoke.

You who are young, make the most of your youth. Relish your youthful vigor. Follow the impulses of your heart. If something looks good to you, pursue it. But know also that not just anything goes; You have to answer to God for every last bit of it.”

(Ecc. 11:6,8,9 The Message)
We aren’t young any more. Those of you who are, pay close attention.

Approach every day from God’s perspective. Pray ahead. Follow Him, don’t try to lead. Today is not just about today. The picture is far bigger than what you and I see.

And that’s a good thing. I’m glad I didn’t see this part of the picture years ago. It feels different than it would have looked to us then. Maybe because Kerry prayed ahead every morning….

Gloom, despair, and agony.....

Gloom, despair, and agony on me. Deep dark depression, excessive misery…                 ♫♪♪♫••*•♫♪♫•*•♫♪♪*♫♪♪♫••*•♫♪♫•*•♫♪♪*♫♪♪♫••*•♫♪♫•*•♫♪♪*

I loved Hee Haw. I think Solomon’s favorite skit would have been the singers whining about their bad luck.

 
"What do workers gain from their toil? I have seen the burden God has laid on the human race………. And I saw something else under the sun: In the place of judgment--wickedness was there, in the place of justice--wickedness was there.” ( Ecc. 3:9,10,16 NIV )

“Again I looked and saw all the oppression that was taking place under the sun..”(Ecc 4:1 NIV)

"There is one other thing I have learned. God made people good, but they have found many ways to be bad." (Ecc. 7:29 ERV)

　

I’ve lived many a day in the presence of heaviness like that. Seeing all the yuck that goes on in the world doesn’t do much for one’s spirits.

But in the face of what should be gloom and despair, there is little.

After standing against what is wrong under the sun for so many years, after seeing things upside down, injustice, corruption, oppression, hopelessness….

After seeing much despair and depression…..

There is reward and blessings. Blessed beyond measure by knowing that something done made a difference.

So now dear husband of mine…. “ Relish life with the spouse you love Each and every day of your precarious life. Each day is God's gift…..” (Ecc. 9:9 The Message )

Glory.

Are you happy, happy, happy?

Yes, I’m a Duck Dynasty viewer. If you’re not, you won’t get this….

Phil’s life story is profound. He didn’t call it ‘chasing after wind’ like The Teacher of Ecclesiastes , and he didn’t call it ‘chasing his tail’ like I do, he refers to it as ‘runnin’ after sex, drugs, and rock & roll’.

He often says something makes someone ‘happy, happy, happy’. But he will be the first to tell you that he never found any happiness until he surrendered to the God Who created Him. Not until he came to know and follow Jesus Christ was there anything that truly made him ‘happy, happy, happy’.

"Laughter," I said, "is madness. And what does pleasure accomplish?" (Ecc. 2:2 NIV)


“A person can do nothing better than to eat and drink and find satisfaction in their own toil. This too, I see, is from the hand of God, for without him, who can eat or find enjoyment? To the person who pleases him, God gives wisdom, knowledge and happiness, but to the sinner he gives the task of gathering and storing up wealth to hand it over to the one who pleases God. This too is meaningless, a chasing after the wind.” (Ecc. 2:24-26 NIV)

I’ve wrestled often with the words Solomon wrote. He often seems depressed to me. Then again, I identify many times with him. Finding satisfaction in the work we do is important. But we will never be truly happy, happy, happy until we trust God with the outcome of our labor. 


Besides, being happy, happy, happy is not the same thing as being joyful, joyful, joyful. Amen?

Bury your head in the sand.....

I sure try. I didn’t want the scanner in the house, back when those were popular. I quit reading newspapers. I don’t watch the news. I distanced myself from as much possible.

I don’t want to know….Because if I know, it can’t be un-done. If I don’t know, it can’t hurt my feelings or cause me to worry. My mind doesn’t have a back-space bar or delete button. Unfortunately.

“For with much wisdom comes much sorrow; the more knowledge, the more grief.” (Ecclesiastes 1:18 NIV)

　

The price of wisdom is high. You gotta get your head out of the sand, and acquire some knowledge. Become part of bringing God and good into every aspect of your life, and every inch of the realm of your influence.

But be ready to suffer.

Long ago, I told my first daughter-in-law that the older I got, the more I realized how much I did not know. She didn’t like my comment, but has since wholeheartedly agreed with me. She has gained some wisdom, and it brings sorrow and grief.

The more truth you know from God’s Word, the more evil you will recognize.

The more imperfections you identify, the more powerless you feel.

　
“…for the joy of the LORD is our strength." (Nehemiah 8:10 NIV personalized by me)

　
Thank You Lord God for the joy you give, even in the face of sorrow. Thank You that we are not without Your comfort and help. Help me to keep my head out of the sand.

What is the profit margin?

In retail, it is simple to figure. Merchandise is marked up with a certain percentage and sold for that profit.

What is the profit margin in life….how do you measure it?

If whatever we do has no eternal fruit, there is no profit. You can live in the biggest house in town, drive the most expensive car on the market, have a fat bank account, wear the finest garments….and have accomplished absolutely nothing profitable.

After reading thru Proverbs I continue this morning into the writings of “The Teacher”.

Solomon was the wisest, richest man ever. At the end of his life, he looks back critically on all that he had experienced and accomplished. Most of it he considered as what he called vanity and I refer to as ‘chasing my tail’.

　

　

“What do people gain from all their labors at which they toil under the sun?” (Ecclesiastes 1:2 NIV)


Looking back on the live we have lived, we look for the profit. We look for eternal value, a life that was changed, re-directed, protected.

There is fruit. We have been shown a few small fruits. Encouraged…

Ugh...that Proverbs 31 woman !!

Who of us can measure up to her?!?

Certainly I fail in much of it, but this I do not. “Her husband is respected at the city gate…..” (Proverbs 31:23 NIV)

While some people think the problem situations in the community are Kerry’s fault, and some people have no confidence in him, he has received many words of encouragement and respect from the citizens of the city.

(vs. 15) “She gets up while it is still night…” (Yes, but only because I can’t sleep !!)
　

(vs. 25) “She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come..” (oh I hope so…)
　

　

My day will be ordinary. Well, except for the conversation about recent events. It is my desire to move forward. My mind and heart are tired of it all. I say that, yet so easily I am drawn into talking about what nobody can fully understand.


Most of you reading my words can not possibly empathize. As I often tell others, you can’t know what you don’t know.  

Most all of you sympathize, but few of you know what it’s like by personal knowledge. And that is good. I would not wish that you have the knowledge and experience of what has just come to an end.


“Without wood a fire goes out…” (Proverbs 26:20a NIV)

I purpose today to not throw logs on the fire. God help me.

It is over....

No more calls in the middle of the night.

No more training and fretting over young officers.

No more interruptions as we try to enjoy a meal out.

No more lots of stuff…

No more wearing a badge and a gun.

　

　

　

　

God speaks again thru scripture, right where I pick up again.

“The start of a quarrel is like a leak in a dam, so stop it before it bursts.” (Proverbs 17:14 The Message)


Quarreling is not constructive. This has been highly visible. It was my husband’s choice that this be done in the open, not under the table or cloaked in any way.

We don’t live or work in/for the city of New Boston. While it is over for us, perhaps it is not over for you. As we have assured our two sons, we are at peace with this decision. We have no desire for this to turn into ugliness. For those of you who disagree with the decision that has been handed down, I challenge you to take whatever steps you take, in a right way.

　

I am comforted by His continued inspired Word.

　

“When the LORD takes pleasure in anyone's way, he causes their enemies to make peace with them.” (Proverbs 16:7 NIV)

Laughter is the best medicine...

“Moderation is better than muscle, self-control better than political power.
Make your motions and cast your votes, but GOD has the final say.”
(Proverbs 16:32,33 The Message)



God decided to make me laugh.

I picked up where I left off, and this is what He says....chuckle. He does have a sense of humor !!



I appreciate every single text, inbox message, comment, phone call, hug, and especially prayers spoken with us and for us. I won't enter into conversations on Facebook about this, but do want to acknowledge your encouragement, your friendship, and your loyalty. They mean more than you can possibly know.

In the face of dishonor, we receive an outpouring of honor, respect, and love.

God has the most incredible ways of getting things done. We anticipate tonight with confidence, and I DO use that word on purpose….

I just felt like runnnniiinnngggg........

Another movie favorite, Forrest Gump. Oh how many times I’ve heard lines repeated from sweet, simple, wise Forrest Gump.

When asked why he was running across America, he said, (with a baffled look on his face about the question), “I just felt like running.”

It brings to mind another line, not one from a movie, but from one of the many arrest situations Kerry has been involved in. “Pinkham, you’re the fastest ______ white man I ever saw!!”

We’ve repeated it hundreds of time, (without filling in that blank). If you took off running, Kerry Pinkham would chase you. And he’d catch you. (…happened again not too long ago.)

Kerry is also known for his handshake. Many fellow officers down thru the years have been ‘put down’ with his massive hand and its incredible strength. Every new young officer wanted to try him. He loved it, certainly it was a stress reliever from the work they do. (A touch of arthritis has made him a little less ready for the handshake challenges…)

　

“The glory of young men is their strength, gray hair the splendor of the old.” (Proverbs 20:29 NIV)

“Gray hair is a crown of splendor; it is attained in the way of righteousness.” (Proverbs 16:31 NIV)

Though his dark hair is now silver, he can still run, but you will never see him running away.

He is still the strongest man I know.

He's got a plan, a-formulatin' in his mind !!!!

My guys know some movie scripts word for word. When together, they are known to think of one of them, pick up a character, and off we go….. The conversation becomes a recitation of every word, of every scene, of the entire movie.

One of their favorites is an old Don Knotts movie, Shakiest Gun In The West. Don Knotts’ character claimed to have ‘a plan, a-formulatin’ in his mind.’

　

　

So did we.

We planned ahead.

But often, plans made differ from what the Lord has planned. As our plans seem not to come to fruition, we must submit the outcome to the God Who is sovereign over all.

I am yet again in awe of how faithfully God speaks to me thru scripture. I began this look thru Proverbs weeks ago. Of all places to find comfort, this is not my go-to place, but I have found it here daily.

　

“Many are the plans in a person's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails.” (Proverbs 19:21 NIV)

My plan is to work as I am physically able, then hope the social security I have paid in all these years will provide a little income to add to what small amount I have been able to save.



The plan for Kerry was a couple years more work, then file for his retirement, leaving behind a very long tenure, not with a parade and party, but with honor.

That may not happen. Certainly, the coming last years of our ‘plan’ does not look like what we anticipated.

But the Lord’s purposes will prevail. Whatever He intends for us, it is good. Whatever purpose He has in allowing this season of trial, we continue to pray that we will trust Him completely, honoring Him in our conduct.

My husband’s desire is that nothing is done in secret. Whether that wish will be granted, we don’t know. Most assuredly, Kerry Pinkham has nothing to hide. But in this too, we trust God to be sovereign over the situation, revealing what he deems best.

We appreciate your words of affirmation, and especially your prayers.

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

The more you stir it, the more it stinks....

 
My man is known to say that.

It is not my intention to stir. Yet I am compelled to share our situation.

　

“If imposing a fine on the innocent is not good, surely to flog honest officials is not right.” (Proverbs 17:26 NIV) God’s timing in leading my study of scripture, is again, perfect.

　

　

Earlier this week, after 40 years of service to the city of New Boston without one single reprimand, Kerry was given a letter that informed him of a special city council meeting to be held Monday evening to discuss terminating his employment on the ground of ‘lack of confidence’.

There is notice posted on the door of the council chambers if you would like proof.

I have shared this man for the entirety of our married life. It was my choice to do so, and it was his choice to put that badge on and stand against wrong. He has done so many times in difficult situations.

He has had broken bones. He has been bitten, spit on, and cursed. He has been bled on and vomited on. He has pulled burned bodies and dead children out of cars. He has defended the rights of hundreds. He has enforced the laws that we are under with grace and mercy when grace and mercy were called for.

My list could go on for hours.

He is the most honest person I know.

He is frugal yet generous.

He is the first to put hand to what needs to be done, whether working a wreck or scubbing a toilet. (…and I don’t mean just ours)

　

Now, he is about to be fired because a few men don’t have ‘confidence’ in him.

　

　

Every single year, he managed his department with money left in his budget.

Hundreds and hundreds of calls answered, cases worked, investigations carried out, arrests made….

Are there still problems within the city? Absolutely. Are drugs available? Certainly. Fighting against wrong will be an ongoing struggle until Jesus returns. And making a drug bust is not quite as simple as it looks like on an episode of some police drama on television. (It would be simpler and far quicker for the landlords of those houses to evict the people who are contributing to the problem, than to rent their properties to them and then demand that they be stopped from doing what they do.)

　

It takes specific information for a police action to be legal, (unless the residents don’t mind paying off lawsuits for violations of personal rights) An embedded undercover agent is vital to get the right information at the right time. Without that, by the time all of the information is documented, the evidence gathered, a warrant issued, most often the dealer has smelled a rat and is clean, or gone.

While the few officers on the street sit and watch, you will wonder why they don’t respond quicker to your 911 call.

Ugh.

While it is not my intention or desire to make a stinky situation even smellier, it is my intention that people are informed. Kerry Pinkham has a lot of faults, but incompetence is not one or them. His integrity is paramount, his honesty complete.

This man whose integrity is called into question said to me… “I’m certainly not saying I’m Jesus, but I’ve learned a little bit about what He must have felt like. …He was lied about, taken before the rulers and accused yet innocent. Betrayed.”

He will stand by his convictions, and I will stand beside him. Come what may, we know that God has us in His Hand. Our desire is to walk thru this time in a way that brings glory and honor to Him…even if it means being dishonored and rejected.

　

　

I thank God for preserving the words of His servant David in Psalm 37.

　
“Do not fret……because of those who are evil or be envious of those who do wrong;
for like the grass they will soon wither, like green plants they will soon die away.

Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.
Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.
Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this:

HE will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn, your vindication like the noonday sun.

Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes.


Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret--it leads only to evil…..

For those who are evil will be destroyed, but those who hope in the LORD will inherit the land. A little while, and the wicked will be no more; though you look for them, they will not be found. But the meek will inherit the land and enjoy peace and prosperity.

The wicked plot against the righteous and gnash their teeth at them; but the Lord laughs at the wicked, for he knows their day is coming. The wicked draw the sword and bend the bow to bring down the poor and needy, to slay those whose ways are upright.

But their swords will pierce their own hearts, and their bows will be broken. Better the little that the righteous have than the wealth of many wicked; for the power of the wicked will be broken, but the LORD upholds the righteous.

The blameless spend their days under the LORD's care, and their inheritance will endure forever. In times of disaster they will not wither; in days of famine they will enjoy plenty.

But the wicked will perish: Though the LORD's enemies are like the flowers of the field, they will be consumed, they will go up in smoke. The wicked borrow and do not repay, but the righteous give generously; those the LORD blesses will inherit the land, but those he curses will be destroyed.

The LORD makes firm the steps of the one who delights in him; though he may stumble, he will not fall, for the LORD upholds him with his hand.

I was young and now I am old, yet I have never seen the righteous forsaken or their children begging bread. They are always generous and lend freely; their children will be a blessing.

Turn from evil and do good; then you will dwell in the land forever. For the LORD loves the just and will not forsake his faithful ones. Wrongdoers will be completely destroyed; the offspring of the wicked will perish. The righteous will inherit the land and dwell in it forever.

The mouths of the righteous utter wisdom, and their tongues speak what is just.
The law of their God is in their hearts; their feet do not slip.
The wicked lie in wait for the righteous, intent on putting them to death;
but the LORD will not leave them in the power of the wicked or let them be condemned when brought to trial.

Hope in the LORD and keep his way. He will exalt you to inherit the land; when the wicked are destroyed, you will see it.

I have seen a wicked and ruthless man flourishing like a luxuriant native tree,
but he soon passed away and was no more; though I looked for him, he could not be found.

Consider the blameless, observe the upright; a future awaits those who seek peace.
But all sinners will be destroyed; there will be no future for the wicked.

The salvation of the righteous comes from the LORD; he is their stronghold in time of trouble. The LORD helps them and delivers them; he delivers them from the wicked and saves them, because they take refuge in him.”

　

　

　

　

Hallelujah.